Parenting is a formidable challenge every parent faces. Although this is difficult, we all enjoy this a lot. Like we all know every kid is different and so do the challenges in parenting is also different for every parent. Here I am going to share 10 Commandments of parenting that will help you in your parenting journey as these were so helpful to me.
1. Don’t try to be perfect:
This is the first and the most important thing to understand that “Perfect parenting is a myth.” We should never try to be perfect in everything we do because we will then end up being disappointed and our confidence in ourselves will go down. I never seek perfection. I feel whatever I do for my kid and if that’s good for her then it’s more than perfect. Because there is no bar of perfection in parenting. Nobody can actually define perfection when it comes to parenting. So be stress free, enjoy the moment with your little one. Be their partner in crime also, it will strengthen the bond between you and your kids.
2. Don’t be convinced easily on everything (Don’t say yes to everything):
Kids are difficult to ignore when they are pleasing you or asking for something in a cute way. The most difficult thing is to say “NO” and that too without hurting their emotions. I try to divert her mind from that thing or sometimes I explain to her why that particular thing is not good for her. By that way they can actually accept your no in a positive way and kids are really very intelligent. they will surely understand you.
3. Stay Positive:
There are days when you feel like everything is going exactly opposite and nothing seems to be in the right direction. You will doubt yourself as a parent and feel like you are the worst parent. But in all such weird circumstances all you have to do is stay positive. Just by being positive you can change the vibes of your surroundings. Positive parent is the best and can give a great upbringing to a kid.
4. Chase Your Dreams:
We all have a dream that we put aside as we become parents. We put our dreams at lowest in priority list. What if we became parents, chasing our dreams is the most important thing to do in order to be happy in life. We should teach our kids also how important it is to have dreams in file and work hard to achieve them. We should set an example in front of them to follow. I am an IT Professional and mother of a baby girl. Writing is my hobby and I always wanted to become a writer so here I am chasing and living my dream each and every day. No matter how busy my life is, I always take out some time to spend with my dreams, writing articles etc. This makes me happy and motivates me towards positivity in life. You should plan your day so that you can have some time to achieve your goals also.
5. Set a good example in front of your Kid:
We all want our kid to have good manners and an ideal lifestyle. We try to keep them inspired by telling other’s stories etc but what we sometimes forget to notice is that they are observing our behavior the most. Best way to teach them anything good is to make that our behavior. What we do, they adapt. So for example if you want them to be true and honest then you should never lie or you should never do bad behavior in front of them. It will affect their mind a lot that if my father or mother are lying then it’s ok to lie at some point in order to get saved from the situation. Here you will be setting a bad example unintentionally. So notice your own behavior and set a good example to make your kids a better human being that you want them to be.
6. Keep Promises:
Keeping promises to your kids makes them feel they are important in your life and it also teaches them that they should keep the promise. Make promises to kids and let them know the importance of keeping promises. What I do is, I promise my daughter that if she will finish her homework within 30 mins or something then I will give her chocolates or will take her out for a walk etc. Then she knows that if she finishes her homework soon then she will get rewarded. This makes her encouraged to finish the homework that too very quickly and neatly. Always make small small promises that you can surely fulfill, don’t make promises which are hard to keep and you unfortunately end up breaking it. This will put a bad impression on them as they would feel it’s fine to break promises.
7. Don’t Punish, Educate them instead:
Kids make mistakes. They are growing and learning a lot of things so it’s obvious to make mistakes at this young and learning stage of life. There are a lot of things that we want our kids not to do or we want to stop them from making such mistakes. So when they do anything wrong or make mistakes, what’s our first reaction most of the time is to punish them, shout at them so that they won’t repeat that mistake again. But do you really think it’s a good way? According to me, No. We should explain the negative outcome of that mistake so that they should understand the reason why we are telling them not to do that mistake or any particular thing.
8. Make your kids responsible:
It’s really important to make kids responsible at the very young age so that they will become more responsible human beings as an adult. Now the question would be how to teach them responsibility. So we can start with responsibilities which they can do easily with less help from us or maybe without any help. For example what I do is, I have told my daughter that it’s her responsibility to keep her toys organized in her toy cupboard after she is done playing with them. Initially she asked me to help her while putting them back in the cupboard and I also helped her because here also I am teaching her that we should help each other. But now she does it on her own and hardly asks for any help. So this is just 1 example of making them responsible. There are many other things also like keeping books organized. Keeping the room neat and clean etc. Just try one at a time and then you will be happy to see them becoming responsible.
9. Engage Kids in Healthy Activities:
Kids are getting attached to Mobile games and Television which are somehow not good for their mental and physical growth. As a parent we should make an effort to involve our little ones in healthy activities which improves their Motor Skills. I keep my daughter engaged in clay moulding activities and building blocks. These two are my all time favorite healthy activities to keep my daughter busy.
10. Give Respect:
You have heard about the phrase “Give respect and get respect”, this is applicable when you interact with your little one’s also. In Fact here it applies more as kids are the better mirrors to show you exactly the same reflection of your behavior. The way you behave with them is the way they will revert you. If you respect them and speak politely they will grasp this behavior and become polite or vise versa.